Kitcher cable

Chris: [laughs] That's awfully weak for a kitcher.
Me: A what?
C: Kitcher.
M: What's a kitcher?
C: [now talking in a weird southern /western movie accent] Kitcher cable. For dueling.
M:Dueling?
C: Yessir.
M: Are you from the old west?
C: Yes.
M: So what's a kitcher cable?
C: It's thin.
M: Is it a dagger?
C: Yeah.
M: Do you have to be skilled to use it?
C: Yes, very much.
M: Are you going to duel me?
C: Yessir.

The Fearsome Variety

Chris: There are some bugs of the fearsome variety over there. [points at wall]
Me: Fearsome?
C: Yeah.
M: What kind?
C: Disney [mumble, mumble]
M: Disney? Wouldn't they be cute then?
C: Only the first hundred or so.
M: Oh, the rest aren't?
C: No.
M: How are they fearsome?
C: .... [falls asleep]

Someone needs some paper!

It has happened again! A few nights ago, I was the one talking in my sleep! Unfortunately, Chris didn't write down what I said and so only remembers a gist of what it was about. Apparently, when his alarm went off, I sat up, looked at him, and started frantically asking if what was going on was going to stop (I appeared not to realize it was his alarm clock going off). I don't remember doing this at all.

I do know that I've woken up a few times in the past few weeks thinking there's a spider nearby, feeling quite certain of it and really freaked out, but I've usually been able to figure out it was a dream or something. I really need to get over this spider thing...

Tickle Books

Chris: Why is it telling him to smile?
Me: What?
C: The book.
M: What book?
C: The one on the commercial.
M: How does it make him smile?
C: It says "tickle me" or something.
M: And who is the book making smile?
C: Malfoy.

*Chris has never read any of the Harry Potter books. I'm a huge fan, and do try to persuade him to read the books by leaving them on his nightstand - maybe that's where he got this. :)

Fuzzy Arms and Dope

Chris: [rolls over] Argh! [flops arm]
Me: Arm asleep?
C: Yeah. Finally. [flings arm toward head and pokes eye] Ow.
M: Finally? Did you want it to fall asleep?
C: Yeah, I've been waiting.
M: Why??
C: Because then it's someone else's arm putting the ammonia into the dope.
M: Dope?? Like drugs?!
C: No. The polymer dope. In the jar here. [points at nothing]
M: Oh, at work?
C: Yeah.
M: Why would you want your arm asleep for that?
C: Uh...
M: Wouldn't that be dangerous?
C: Um...yeah.

Picture Update!

So, a while back, Chris and I had a conversation about bald eagles. This past weekend, we took a trip to Myrtle Beach and I captured some evidence of Chris's craziness:
It seems he prefers endangered species to the steakhouse right behind him. Tsk tsk.

Big Scary World

Chris: You don't have to make it as big as it is.
Me: As what?
C: It.
M: What is "it"?
C: Everything.
M: The world?
C: Yeah.
M: You don't like that the world is big?
C: No.
M: Why not?
C: It [mumble mumble mumble]...