Chris: What do we have to clean before check-in?
Me: Who is checking in?
C: Well, you know, like, if I was checking in and giving you my name.
M: This isn't a hotel. Why are you checking in?
C: Well, have you ever been to, like, a fair and if you get there early, they pay you?
M: No! Why would they pay you?
C: Because you waited so long. Are you telling me you really haven't done this?
C: Then you haven't lived!
M: What fair is this?
C: The Winter Festival.
M: Where's that?
C: Massachusetts. Central Mass.
M: So what does this have to do with cleaning and checking in?
C: ...I don't know.